20 Best Books About Borderline Personality Disorder (2023 Update)

This book is very well written with clear examples on how to apply effectively the strategies given. Moreover, this book offers strategies for both family who are continuing their relationship with the person living with BPD and those who need to step away. So often books on this topic demand that the family/friend/carer take responsibility for the person living with BPD's emotions and actions. This is an important step forwardPinkelstien

This book is an interesting read whether you decide that your family member has this problem or not. I enjoyed the book and it has techniques that could be employed in getting along with anyone.quincy1770

BPD is a mystery to many of us, even clinicians. Still, BPD is more common than schizophrenia and twice as common as anorexia nervosa. Compared to the general public, a person with BPD is 400 times more at risk for suicide. BPD is a serious condition that is often misunderstood, misdiagnosed and overlooked. Families of individuals with BPD may be at their wits end, trying to figure out how to live with someone whose emotions resemble a rollercoaster. Not only does this book provide sheer comfort and empathy to families who feel frustrated, lost, alone, powerless and defeated, but it offers a wealth of information that helps loved ones better understand the disorder and start to lead healthier, happier lives themselves. The writing, structure and advice are easy to read and straightforward. Families will undoubtedly appreciate its step-by-step tips and frank tone. The guide is divided into two parts. Part 1 focuses on The ABCs of BPD, which discusses BPD symptoms, risk factors and treatments; relationship challenges; and finding professional help. Kreger helps the reader gain a deeper understanding of how individuals with BPD think, feel and act. For instance, she delves into the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual version IV definition of BPD, discussing in detail its nine traits (including fear of abandonment, intense self-image, impulsivity and intense rage), other common characteristics (such as lying), types of BPD (e.g., high-functioning vs. low-functioning) and other populations with the disorder. She also addresses prevalent misconceptions. First, many loved ones think that they should put themselves last and focus entirely on the individual with BPD. One of the key principles of The Essential Family Guide is to help yourself first. According to Kreger, family members suffer from depression, isolation, helplessness, low self-esteem, sleep deprivation, and even physical illnesses (especially adult children of people with BPD). And, ironically, these issues can eventually damage the relationship, anyway. Families also assume that if their loved one wont change, their lives cant improve. But Kreger points out that this guidebook will teach you the tools and techniques to feel better and get the power back in your life whether your loved one changes or not. She writes: You control your own destiny much more than you think you do, though it takes learning, planning and practicing. Another big misconception surrounds the emotions, thoughts and behaviours of people with BPD. It can seem that these individuals differ dramatically in theseareas from people without the disorder. However, people with BPD, Kreger writes, feel the same emotions that we all do. The difference is the intensity of their emotions. On a scale of 1 (extreme negative feelings) to 10 (extreme positive feelings) the scale runs from an impossible 0 to 11. Same with thoughts and behaviours, which are exaggerated and more frequent. To better grasp this, Kreger includes a unique exercise that helps families put themselves in their loved ones shoes. A great strength of the book is Kregers inclusion of anecdotes and examples. (Advice from experts is also included.) The personal stories are particularly powerful. Readers get perspectives from loved ones of individuals with BPD and the individuals themselves. For instance, in the chapter on relationships, Kreger describes what she terms the five dysfunctional dances. In the testing tango, she includes quotes from a woman whos recovered from BPD – a real life focus. Throughout the book, Kreger includes practical, real-world advice. For instance, in the chapter on finding professional help, she dissects the steps for searching out a reputable therapist, including tips on becoming an informed consumer, creating a medical file and finding referrals along with questions to ask. Part 2 is heavy on the how-tos, which provide invaluable insight for approaching individuals with BPD and helping yourself. These chapters dig deeper into self-care and provide families with five power tools: taking care of yourself; identifying why youre stuck and how to get unstuck; communicating effectively with people with BPD; setting limits; and reinforcing the right behaviour. Kreger gives examples of phrases you can say to your loved one to fend off fueling the argument. In the chapter on reinforcing the right behaviour, Kreger spells out scenarios that showcase how families may inadvertently reinforce bad behaviour and how they can promote positive behaviour. Again, its these real-life tips that make this book a must-read for families.ozhappybrowser

This book has helped me truly understand and escape the continued "dance" of my Borderline mother. It is practical and in depth. It is easily read and has pertinent information about the disease. I feel much better about myself after reading and learning that her behaviour is her problem, not mine!meli.thom

Thoroughly enjoyed reading this book. It is backed my psychology, but also has input from mothers with bpd and children of mothers with bpd. Highly recommend to those wanting to understand bpd!SEJ

I, like many ,who were raised by a parent (s) who suffer from BPD and create suffering in their children, should read this book ,as a starting point for insight about , and into this horrible disorder which plagues families, and leaves in its wake ,broken children, into broken adults, with damaged souls. this book for me , is a starting point to finding out some of those answers , that i have had questions for for many years.steven8357

Of all the books I've read, none have taught me better how to control my thoughts. I have BPD and a few other things so this really helps.revanjj

A great reference, particularly for sufferers of borderline personality disorder (BPD). It provides evidence-based, practical and useful information to help sufferers understand the disorder and deal with it's symptoms. It's quite easy to use, with clearly set out chapters which address specific symptoms and provides check lists and exercises for dealing with them. It is a very good book to give as a gift to someone with BPD, particularly someone who has been recently diagnosed. James De'Ath BA (Comm St), BEdtiersman2

For me as a senior with BPD, not diagnosed until i was in my 60's, an uncommon situation I acknowledge, but in some respects, possibly a more difficult & isolating age group, so maybe I am not contributing anything of value. I did find that the book almost exclusively deals with a much younger demographic, which is fine as the majority of sufferers are young people. Something I did find helpful, were the simply & plainly stated scenarios for a given problem, together with the recommended action. These were valuable for any age group. This book bears constant dipping into & re-reading in order to garner the most value from the highly qualified authors. Anyone who has BPD climbs mountains every day, this book gives us a "map" to follow .paintingpossum

I highly recommend this book for anyone that has been professionally diagnosed with borderline personality disorder this book is also excellent for people who live or know someone with this mental illness I am diagnosed with this it mental illness and this book has really helped me and to get the most out of this book read it slowly take your time with the book take notes and don't be afraid to learn about what it's like to live with this mental illness because people who don't understand you will never understand you until they read a book or talk to your professional providerSelena

A must read… The Borderline Personality Disorder Survival Guide is organized as a series of answers to questions common to BPD sufferers: What is BPD? How long does it last? What other problems co-occur with BPD? Overviews what we currently know about BPD make up the first section of the book. Later chapters cover several common treatment approaches to BPD: dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT), mentalization-based therapy (MBT), and medical treatment using psychoactive drugs. In the last sections of the book, readers learn a range of day-to-day coping skills that can help moderate the symptoms of BPD.ozhappybrowser

The authors attempt to explain BPD and DBT in simple terms comes across as condescending. Didn't hit the mark for me personally.Alice

This book is very informative and easy to understand. I have a family member with BPD and this book provided me with so much information!!!! This is the 4th copy I have purchased. The others I passed on to family members and a counselor. The counselor liked it so much he shared it with other members of the staff where he works.phyl118

The best and simplest way I've come across to explain BPD to children. It's not too heavy or in depth. Basic points accompanied by lovely illustrations. Well recommendedsimonutr

Having a family member with this mental illness, it was so wonderful to be able to put these processes into such simple terms and have such a positive reference to some of the good things that can come out of being made different. The artwork was essential in telling the inner story as well as being able to smile at the familiarity of the themestashamcdee

I found this book a great resource for understanding and helping a loved one with BPD. Originally I checked it out of the local library, but quickly found the information provided would be a good addition to my personal library and decided to order this book. Easy to read and understand. Author has a sister who most likely had BPD, so his passion to help people and family is from first hand concern and desire to truly help. Also interesting that a low dose of antipsychotic medication worked to help control emotions and impulsive behavior so that BPD persons could benefit from therapy to change their perceptions and responses for better quality of life.mmcconnell88

This was a really great read offering a simplistic understanding to BPD. The authenticity of the writers opens readers up to a truly empathetic perspective on the disorder. Some of the contributors are quite eloquent in their writing which adds an additional pleasing element to the book. The very sincere and raw accounts that the contributors provided offer a substantiated degree of hope for those on their BPD healing journey, as well as an insiders perspective to someone who has a loved one that suffers with BPD. There's a level of discussion on therapies, most significantly the success of DBT, which garners true inspiration in leading a life worth living.Healing Boulevard

This is a great book for enyone dealing with a family member or a loved one with BPD. I have read a lot of books on BPD, but nothing was so practical and easy to follow as this one.ew7009_co9ffmk

Excellent guide! I am the daughter of a woman who has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). For years, the frustration, anger, sadness, of what I suffered through and was subjected to, affected me in all areas of my life. There were dark, depressive mental clouds that followed me no matter where I was. I tried to fix things my own way, but nothing worked, so the relationship and myself continued to deteriorate into horrific depths of the unwell. After reading books written by Dr. Lobel, including his latest one, "When a Loved One Has Borderline Personality Disorder", I’ve gained the clarity through the fog which I had been missing. This latest book is an incredible guide, almost like a pocket-therapist in some aspects for me. Knowing the signs, and the corrective action that I needed to implement if I wanted my relationship with my mother to continue and move forward, have been of immeasurable value. I am glad to say that the relationship has improved because of this. This relationship is a work in progress for me, and I am confident that with the guidance from Dr. Lobel's books, there will be many better and happier times ahead. A truly remarkable accomplishment for which there can never be enough thanks.Maltesa4

This is a great source if you have struggled with being brought up by a BPD parent or have someone in your life that has BPD. It takes you through everything you need to know to understand what has happened & the affects it has left on you and gives you skills to manage the future. It can be challenging but is well worth the effort. I would like to thank the author for this wonderful healing tool. 5stars if l could give more l would!!! Highly RecommendedKim

This book has been an excellent tool that has helped me to understand the way I think & feel at times. I have a better understanding of my parent who suffered BPD. I have had emotions validated. Finally I have been given hope, that I am on the road to healing and recovery.ksmac65

some good advice given about how to tackle ones own probs from such. Not read ot all though just bits so far. remember no ones perfect.stevesmd

This is a great tool to use for managing my BPD traits and learning more about myself and the condition. It's not overwhelming and it encourages you to go at your own pace. I really like it.celestecami

This is so handy when used with the YouTube videos and other online resources. I have had health care providers say they are not interested in treating BPD and it's hard to get help. This allows you to help yourself and really understand why you behave the way you do and how to get over it. Dr Fox is great.Emma

This is a great book that gets to the point and is understandable. It explains the science and reasonable examples that are easy and interesting to understand. I am really glad this book was recommended to me. I recommend this book to everyone.annicorle_0

Had notes written on only four pages, though otherwise the book is unwritten in. I appreciate all the examples provided throughout the book. Helps attach personality and a face to the disorder.hoarderr

very thorough, but written at a level that may difficult for some readers. Anyone with a college education should be able to comprehend the content. It would help to also have some background knowledge in the field of counseling, psychology, etc. The book explains in detail not only the behaviors of someone suffering from borderline personality disorder but also the workings behind the behaviors. It delves into the mind to explain why the person behaves in a certain way. It helps family and friends better understand the person with the disorder.nonickworks

Excellent for those treating people with personality disorders and those with an interest. I have been using it as a source of information for DBT groupsgray1975-40

An Excellent Read! It was very simple to understand and the large print was excellent…..Great for those working with this disorder. It would also teach someone how to deal with this behavior if it was for personal use.windspirit51